50th Birthday Quotes 

Funny 50th birthday quotes and jokes

The gray hair and onset of wrinkles that accompany a 50th birthday represent the final confirmation that youth is long gone.
Men who reach the half-century mark may find themselves envious of their back because it goes out more than they do.

Found in 50th birthday quotes are sentiments of the wisdom, maturity and gentle-nature that most people can claim when they reach the age of 50. Those who make it to this milestone can now claim the knowledge that a younger generation already thinks they possess.

Turning 50 also represents a halfway mark in the journey of life. With that milestone a person commands memories that can fill volumes. Some reflections may be unpleasant, but with those an individual can share knowledge about how to avoid their mistakes in life.

Those who are truly wise realize that 50th birthday quotes highlight the continuance of a journey in which they will see greater
levels of success, self-confidence, happiness and life’s most precious gifts – the love and respect of others. And along the way, they can also expect more visits to the doctor and bathroom.

50th birthday quotes and jokes
  • Don't just count your years. Make your years count.

Turning 50 jokes

  •  There are numerous advantages in being fifty – just ask any eighty year old!

  • Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
             Jack Benny

  • I can still do everything now that I did at 20, of course with my doctor's permission.

  • Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.
             Tom Wilson

  • 50 years: here's a time when you have to separate yourself from what other people expect of you, and do what you love. Because if you find yourself 50 years old and you aren't doing what you love, then what's the point?
             Jim Carrey

  • You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
             Ogden Nash

  • The really frightening thing about middle age is that you know you'll grow out of it.
             Doris Day

  • After a man is 50, you can fool him by saying he is smart, but you can't fool him by saying he's pretty.
             E.W. House

  • They say that age is all in your mind.  The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body.

  • Forty is the old age of youth, fifty is the youth of old age.
             Victor Hugo

  • I refuse to admit I'm more than fifty-two, even if that does make my sons illegitimate.
             Lady Nancy Astor

  • If I knew I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself.
             Mickey Mantle

  • At fifty you’ve accumulated the knowledge and wisdom of half a century. This would be a tremendous asset if only darned senility hadn’t wiped your memory bank.

  • Fifty isn´t old...if you are a tree!

  • To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or be respectable.
             Oscar Wilde

Turning 50 jokes
  • The secret of staying young is to live honestly, and lie about your age.

50th birthday jokes

  • Middle age is when a narrow waist and a broad mind begin to change places. - Glenn Dorenbush

  • You're still hot, but only in flashes.

  • You finally get your head together, and your body has other ideas.

  • You know you’re old when you turn down the lights to be economical instead of romantic.

  • You know you’re 50 when your idea of getting lucky is being able to find your car in Walmart’s parking lot on the first try.

  • The good thing about having a bad memory is that jokes can be funny more than once.

  • After turning 50, everything that doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work.

  • You and your teeth have decided that a separation is the best thing for your relationship.

50th birthday jokes